A difficult question. One I wish not to encounter in the next two decades, hahaha!
I dream of an easy relationship with my daughter. I wanted to be not just her mother but also her friend. I wanted to be the first person that she trust her secrets with before confiding with anyone else. But us we all mothers know, it’s not about us. It’s about them and what’s good for them.
Personally, I know what it feels like to want to go out with friends at that age, what more with the craving of having to experience young love. I had a strict father who required us be home by six pm. I hated him then because I do not understand the reason behind that. I feel like I was not trusted to be responsible. But I grew up and as I watch the young teenagers of the new generation openly flirt with boys, I feel disgusted for them. Now I understand that it’s not about being trusted. It’s about a father’s love to his daughter, protecting her of the world outside and preventing her from acting carelessly. Good intentions they may be. I didn’t like it one bit.
But now that I am armed with experience and understanding of my father’s actions, I somehow have an idea of how to deal with this scenario.
I promised myself not be strict with Una. I wanted her to experience life as it is. If one day, Una would ask for permission to go out with a boy, I would let her. BUT and yes it’s a big BUT, there are rules to follow. First date should be under our roof. I wanted to observe them first. If things progressed after that then a weekend date with a chaperone. Of course, good grades should be met. If the relationship proves to be a distraction, they have to stop. Do the chores first before anything else. I think it would be great if I could talk to the boy’s parents first. We obviously share the same sentiments since our children are of the same age and experiencing these things for the first time.
I know I’m being idealistic with this but I do not want my daughter to rebel against me because we didn’t let her go out. Plus I think, the more I expose her to those emotions at a young age and with my guidance, I know that any heart break will only make her stronger. Plus the more that we are open to her, the less risk of her wanting to do something in secret.
Geez, this meme made me want to think of the “The Talk” conversation. Maybe Mommy Mitch should include that in future memes. We didn’t have that with parents and I learned through reading *clears throat* romance novels.